The Five Stages of Grief (Acceptance)

I may have loved him without knowing

He had eyes like whisky,

I dared to swim in them,

to drink from his gaze.

I may have loved him without knowing.

He had skin like the earth,

skin like mine, but not like mine,

the Indian guy and the black girl,

the Asian and the African.

I may have loved him without knowing.

I was blinded by kisses and caresses,

hands that uncovered every inch,

fingers, arms, and legs entwined.

I may have loved him without knowing.

I refused to say the words,

to speak without thinking,

refused to give him my heart.

Still, I may have loved him without knowing.

Even when he stopped calling,

stopped coming around,

I remembered the warmth of his body,

his breath on my face.

Now he’s gone and I knew he would be.

I may have loved him without knowing.

The Five Stages of Grief (Bargaining)

Anything 

You were right to leave,

right to call a quits. I wasn’t

good enough; wasn’t good for us,

but I could change.

If you come back things would be

different.

I could lose the weight.

No more love handles,

no more chubby girl.

I could do it for you,

be the woman you want me to be.

I could grow my hair long.

You loved to run your fingers

through my hair, but there was

never enough,

I was never enough.

I could leave my job,

make more time for you,

more time for us.

Give you all of me for as

long as you want.

If you would just come back,

I could be the lover you want.

I’d learn to please you,

make you yearn for me, salivate

at the very thought of me.

I would do that for you.

I would do anything for you,

anything.